@_sweet_ham: I never wanted to believe that my Dad was stealing from his job as a road worker. But when I got home, all the signs were there.
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@Black__Elvis: Just found a hole in my sock and now I'm worried that the whole drawer might be pregnant.
@MdUNH: Expendables 4 (Rated R): Tom, Sylvester & Wiley Coyote coldly hunt down & eat Jerry, Tweety & Roadrunner. Directed by Quentin Tarantino.
@wickedsuga: Kim on FB needs help deciding if the snot in her kid's nose is from allergies or not. His Dr. says yes, but she really needs your opinion.
@sock_holliday: The person that invented toilet paper is easily the most under-appreciated hero in human history