@daplusk: I nod and smile at empty places just to confuse any ghosts that might be there into thinking i can see them.
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@mauleePillar: My toddler appears to know a magic spell to transform any space into a Hoarders episode.
@MickSnark: Using dog shampoo when I run out of cat shampoo because I ran out of human shampoo a week ago.
@mewritesgood: Hey Google, if I'm searching for "herpes symptoms" then no, no I'm not "feeling lucky."
@thejayroyal: Damn girl, can I get all up in that? I'm sorry, where are my manners. MAY I get all up in that?