@WildeThingy: I often think if I'd taken a different path in life, I could be lying on a slightly more comfortable sofa right now.
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@Darchstar078: Fact: Roughly 40% of my childhood was spent preparing for the day I fall into a pit of quicksand.
@5hael: Do you think it's weird that the only reason we still have landlines is so cops in movies can wake each other up in the middle of night?
@HousewifeOfHell: My daughter told me I'm "slightly prettier than Ben Franklin," so I have that going for me.