@Black__Elvis: I only buy expensive baby food with cute babies on the label because I'm willing to pay extra if it means my kids aren't eating ugly babies.
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@krismuscookie: *With only office supplies, she diffuses the bomb with 1 second to spare* Boss: What are you doing? Me: *shoves action figures in desk.*
@rainbowrowell: These protests are PLANNED. These opposition groups are ORGANIZED. My enemies are USING CALENDARS. Someone signed up to BRING DOUGHNUTS.
@KattsDogma: "How about we go with a gerund, but, like, maybe just half a gerund." - How ING Bank got its name
@SimplyEffortful: My husband: It'd be nice to have a wife who cooked dinner. Me: ooo!! Can we get one?