@Token_Geezer: I only had kids so I'd have a valid excuse for always being late
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@Tmoney68: All my scars & bruises tell a story. The story of a guy who falls down A LOT when he's drunk.
@Ristolable: I never made it as a firefighter. I thought arsonists were people who hated arson, so every time we met one I thanked him for his support
@SamGrittner: Every horse you've ever seen has two people inside them. Horses aren't real. Commitment is.