@eileencurtright: I ordered a bed from IKEA and they sent me a tree trunk and a saw.
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@Michael1979: Reasons I'm not married: - Am focusing on my karate career - Wedding could clash with karate class - Honeymoon might make me miss karate training - All the lovemaking could sap my energy ahead of karate class - Wife may be in cahoots with my rivals to distract me from karate
@lil_dead_girl_: I compulsively open my refrigerator in hopes that the portal to the other world has opened up. It hasn't so I had some cheese.