@fanofhell: I own a gun so if a robber breaks into my home and steals my stuff I can shoot all my stuff and break it so the robber can't enjoy any of it
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@ItsAndyRyan: A thief has removed all the motorway signs in Yorkshire. Police are currently trying to find Leeds.
@rachelle_mandik: a kid i met insisted she visited the "vampire state building" and i couldn't bring myself to correct her
@jjax44: I start, but can rarely complete my paintings and sculptures, for I am a master of the partial arts.
@IamEnidColeslaw: "911, what is your emergency?" I got stuck in a beaded curtain "Again?" SEND HELP