@MartaEffing: I paid 4 the lady in front of me @ Starbucks. She hugged me. Deciding when it's the right time 2 tell her I hit her car in the parking lot.
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@aRealLiveGhost: anti-tattoo people saying "my body's a temple" like they wouldn't worship at a temple that had an enormous mural of a tiger fighting a cobra
@LizzieEMB: Him: Should you be eating that much chocolate? Me: Should you be using that much oxygen?
@Tmoney68: [Theater] GF: I got M&M’s. Me: I can’t eat those here. GF: Why? M: *exasperated sigh* Because it’s too dark to separate them by color.
@freudianscript: I'm not here to fix your problems, i'm here to set an example of what happens when your problems don't get fixed.