@AnniemuMary: I painted 1 room & then the hallway and room next to it looked kinda shabby and I'm guessing this is how plastic surgery gets out of hand.
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@fro_vo: [on a date] Me: so how bout *seductively takes a bite of an orange* we go to my place Date: you’re supposed to peel that first
@sploosk: THERAPIST: what's the problem? WIFE: he objectifies women ME: [trying to stuff bread into her armpit] toaster
@squirrel74wkgn: Wife: Me: (swish, swish, swish) Wife: Me: (swish, swish, swish) Wife: Me: (swish, swish, swish) Wife: I hate your corduroys