@HarryRamble: I painted a banner for our annual family picnic, but my Mom thought "Celebrating 100 Years of Undiagnosed Mental Illness" was inappropriate.
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@internetluke: Jesus: saw that facebook event "last supper"... looks good but whys it called the "last supper" ? Judas: oh.. No reason really
@UncleDuke1969: “It’s a bird! It’s a plane! It’s Superman!” “Nope.” “A spider? An aardvark?” “Wrong. It’s a horse.” “Wow. You can’t draw for shit.”
@TheFemKilljoy: The only time I hate being single is when I knock something over & catch it before it hits the ground but there's no one around to see it.
@salmarch79: Due to the economic crisis and ever increasing price of food, the 5 second drop rule has now been increased to 10.