@djdarrellripley: I pray every night that I never become religious...
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@donni: Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend. Inside of a dog, though, it's every man for himself
@AdderallMomma: Folks are worried about global warming and social security, when the real crisis is that one day elderly drivers will know how to text.
@13spencer: A San Francisco man is running seven marathons in seven days on seven continents; he’s expected to be seven times as annoying about it.