@PresidentGrimes: I promise to find a new girlfriend right away when my old girlfriend gets eaten by walkers.
America needs a first lady.
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@Swishergirl24: On a scale of 1 to 10, how married are you?
@OhNoSheTwitnt: If you're not singing "Hitler Baby one more time" to the tune of Britney Spears' "Hit Me Baby One More Time" I'm sorry but you are now.
@stephenjmolloy: Ian: It's done. Mafia boss: Did you go anywhere nice? I: What? MB: Like a restaurant. I: I killed him. MB: I said take him out! Oh god, Tim!
@heatherjs: Sex Ed should require them to listen to a crying baby for 5 hours, and to watch the same episode of a cartoon over and over again.
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