@moose_chocolate: I, put commas, in, weird places, so that, you, read, my tweets, like William, Shatner.
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@Tetley6969: At the restaurant I heard a lady say her taco was too salty. My wife had to leap over the table and cover my mouth before I said something.
@envydatropic: It's cute how my family thinks I'm playing with fire and I'm just trying to cook them breakfast