@SondraDeeMe: I put my shoes on like everyone else. I beckon for my footman, Chauncey, and he does it straightaway. Your guy probably has a different name
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@idigcrazychics: You can't boss me around until you're older than the whiskey I drink. -subtweet to my GF
@Zombie_Kitv2: Even in a suit, Matthew McConaughey looks like he's just been rescued after two weeks lost in the desert.
@OtherDanOBrien: DENTIST: Been flossing? ME: Yup D: [reaches into my mouth & pulls out a copy of the NY Times dated 7/5/14] I put this in there last time