@Tmoney68: I ran without my headphones today & was reminded that I feel better about my fitness when my soundtrack isn't my panicked gasping breathing.
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@djdarrellripley: Why in the hell would I clean my bathtub? I put soap and water in there every day...
@KamaroPayne: My kids are gone for the WHOLE day. nnI miss them SO much, I can barely bring myself to pop this 3rd bottle of Champagne.
@audipenny: Why are you being weird about how we made eye contact and both smiled and then I took the form of an actual bat and chased you for 11 miles
@Jake_Vig: *opens present HER: What is this? ME: It's The One Ring. I fought orcs for it. HER: They didn't have that Michael Kors bag I showed you?