@TGIJeff: I react to the phrase "open bar" the way my dog reacts to everything
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@Gre_Gone: Interviewer: Any special skills? Me: Eclairvoyance. Him: I don't understand. Me: There's a box of donuts in your desk Him: YOU KNOW TOO MUCH
@just1fool: My daughter asked me if it was illegal to be blind which tells me I didn't explain "legally blind" very well.
@CulturedRuffian: Cat 911: What's your emergency? Cat: I knocked everything off the tables now I'm scared! Cat 911: Seriously? Cat: No, LOL! Cat 911: LOL!
@sammyrhodes: There is no peer pressure like washing your hands because someone else walked into the bathroom.