@SoNotBrendan: I read in the Bible that people used to get stoned to death, that's a lot of weed.
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@all_about_today: Immortality sounded great when I was 23, but now that I'm 38 it just sounds exhausting.
@noog: Me: I wish Inigo Montoya appeared everytime “literally” is misused and did his “You keep saying that word“ bit Genie: That ones on the house
@Discourt: Things I’ve learned as a mom: Kiss boo boo’s. Say I love you a lot. Snuggle when they ask. Do laundry daily. Hide the good snacks.
@vivalamoi448: 4 yo: Mommy, it feels so good. Me: What does? 4 yo: To be a gangster. Me: ... Go tell your father I said to come here.