@runolgarun: I realized I was an adult when I almost bought napkins instead of taking a wad of free ones from Chipotle. Almost.
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@davedittell: *takes load of groceries off of old woman's hands* these are mine now you old prune
@nikkithecanuck: I must admit, my "Kiss Me, I Have The Zika Virus" T-shirt is giving me a lot of personal space inside this subway car.
@junejuly12: The main difference between kids and dogs is that kids grow out of following you to the bathroom