@runolgarun: I realized I was an adult when I almost bought napkins instead of taking a wad of free ones from Chipotle. Almost.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@UhhhJasonWebb: I’ve spent the six years trying to learn Braille via hospital elevators. So far, I know elevator.
@titusbb: I don't understand why people go to the gym all the time... everything there's so heavy.
@Steelers1972: The only difference between Black Friday and a zombie apocalypse is that zombies don't care if you get the last iPad Mini.