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@NinjaFuneral: I really hope we can call ninjas with red hair "ginjas".
@omgthatspunny: There's a new type of broom out, it's sweeping the nation.
@LostCatDog: You can lead a horse to water, but you probably can't do it as well as Sneaky Gary, the serial horse drowner.
@FeelingMervis: DATING TIP: Surprise your date! Show up a day early.
@FunnyIsFamily: My parenting style can best be described as "Go help your sister."
@thenatewolf: *mugger pulls a knife*
Mugger: gimme your money
Me: well this night took a SHARP turn
Doctor: it's a record for amount of stabs