@badbanana: I relate to #PizzaRat because if I found a slice of pizza as big as a car you can bet I'd try my best to take that thing home.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@iwearaonesie: *wife walks over to me* *cups my face with her hands* *looks me in the eye* "Why is there a mousetrap in the fridge?"
@RobocopLust: A portmanteau is when you combine 2 words to make 1 word. A great example of this is Groupon, a mixture of grey and poupon.
@TheAlexNevil: Parents: don't give your child the answers to his homework. He needs to learn on his own that you don't know what you're talking about.
@Brianhopecomedy: Lying on the hammock while my wife does yard work. Don't know exactly what she's planting but the hole she dug is slightly bigger than me.