@SoAnyway1: I remember the first time I saw my girlfriend, her hair was blowing in the wind, but she was too proud to run after it.
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@Mickey_McCauley: For every hour that passes without payment, I will teach another hostage "Wonderwall" on acoustic guitar and release him back to you
@living_marble: One thing books from 100 years ago teach us is that if you leave a baby in the jungle, it'll be fine. Better than fine, actually.
@EJGomez: bicycle cop: im taking you to jail me [sarcastic voice]: should i ride on your pegs or walk next to you [segway cop just dying laughing]