@Ideal_Victoria: I replace all the family pictures my coworkers have on their desks with pictures of baby sloths and suddenly I need professional help?!?
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@RealCarrotFacts: You can tuck a carrot into bed , but it won't know what you are doing because he's a carrot
@Sickayduh: "Oooh look! Is that a comet?" - Well, actually the airport is real close by "Oh ok. Good idea. I'll call them and ask"
@therealeatwood: Instead of complaining that it’s hard to remove glitter, accept it. Embrace it. You are a shiny person now.
@Book_Krazy: * Kindergarten* Hi kids! I'm the homeroom mom for your class. [writes name on chalkboard] [Boy Raises hand] We can't read. No one can read