@WhaJoTalkinBout: i rescue marijuana from the streets.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@lecalabara: If I would brush my teeth as vigorously as the people in the toothpaste commercials do, my sink would look like a murder scene.
@Kristen_Arnett: this morning at 7-eleven i saw a lizard next to the coffee maker and the cashier said "no worries that's just marvin, he likes the smell"
@tchrquotes: Me [seeing they want to give teachers guns because there are guns in schools]: There are also drugs in schools.
@BarebakAssassin: After you're done looking for true love on Twitter, you should go ride a unicorn around Atlantis, then eat some heart-healthy ice cream.