@Thaat_guy: I retweeted my boss to let her know that I know she's tweeting during the meeting.
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@ZombieProblms: I hate being the walking dead. I wish I could be the driving dead. Even the bus riding dead would do.
@LoriLuvsShoes: Who me? Oh I'm just waiting for my husband to apologize for something I did wrong...marriage is fun
@bobvulfov: [getting out of prison after 10 years] GUARD: *handing me a paper bag* here are ur things ME: did none of u monsters feed my tamagotchi
@Poutymcgee: I was in a cafe the other day when I overheard this: "Can you please stop listening to our conversation?"