@juliussharpe: I root against my college football team. That place put me $80,000 in debt. It'd be like rooting for the bank that holds your mortgage.
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@ieatanddrink: Just heard that distinct "baby fell out of the crib and into a pizza that was on the floor" sound
@GregDunbar1: Never realized how out of shape I was until I started sweating after using scissors for 30 seconds.
@AnkCoupleTO: I was in the mood for nuts this morning so I chased a squirrel for 3 miles and the little prick led me right to his stash, yum!