@juliussharpe: I root against my college football team. That place put me $80,000 in debt. It'd be like rooting for the bank that holds your mortgage.
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@TheDailySchmuck: Every time I'm the only black person at a party I think: "Wow. I helped them make quota."
@drinkcherrycoke: So I just found out those stick figures on the back of cars are not to keep track of how many pedestrians you've hit,i will be removing mine
@fart: no dude, if i wash my hands BEFORE going to the bathroom then they won't get my genitals dirty and i won't have to wash my hands after. duh