@KrazykurtKurt: I said "I'm not going to repeat myself"
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@SveldtSmelt: I found where my mom hid the scissors, so everyone in my house woke up with a new haircut this morning.
@jwoodham: "You have a date? With who?" [Sees a fishing boat] "Uh, her name is Net..." [Sees someone with a booger] "Flicks! Net Flicks! Wait. Dammit."
@Sassafrantz: I was so surprised when he said those three little words to me: "You're embarrassingly bad at math. This is over."
@LoveNLunchmeat: You'd be surprised how much of parenting is reminding your children not to eat soup with their hands.