@dlockw21: I saw a bald eagle carry away a bunny rabbit today, and I was like, "well, at least somebody gets to be held."
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@E_lok44: If you eat a block of cheese and do a lunge, it should balance out, right? Actually, it was less lunge, more trip, but still.
@AndyAsAdjective: A lot of people ask me "why do you lie about the high number of people asking you things?"
@Mr_Kapowski: *wife and I start having an argument in a crowded restaurant* *she storms out upset* *I follow* Outside: "DINE AND DASH SUCCESS!" *high 5*