@FattMernandez: I saw a car with "Wash Me" written on it, so I set it on fire. I'll be damned if I'm going to allow cars to become sentient!
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@Cain_Unable: -"I hear the Israeli PM isn't too worried about that latest hack because.." -"Please don't" -"...Benjamin's Not on Yahoo" -"I'm leaving you"
@jrsalzman: Twitter has taught me a couple things. First, there are some incredibly brilliant people in the world. Second, they are vastly outnumbered.
@Thedudish: The recipe said "Set the oven to 180 degrees," so I did, but now I can't open it because the door faces the wall.