@StrawburyDelite: I saw a dog taking a dump and I totally thought of you.
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@ch000ch: "My fellow Americans-" Barack "we are working tirelessly-" Sir "to make sure-" Barack. You're still wearing ur xbox headset
@mattgallo123: Not to brag, but according to this food packaging I just ate enough fancy cashews to serve 638 people.
@toni_goldsetin: My mom always has these great sayings for life, like "Don't count your chickens before they hatch" and "Everybody hates you."