@MelvinofYork: I saw a lady at work today doing “breathing exercises” and realized for the first time how lucky I was that breathing came naturally to me.
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@Pork_Chop_Hair: I don’t like the person you become when I’m on my period.
@fa_que2: You know the meeting has gone completely downhill when someone suggests sacrificing a chicken.
@SgtButtCheeks: My 4yo son just asked what squirrels eat. I answered nuts. We laughed so hard, hugged, and gave each other a high 5. My boy.
@noog: Jesus: I have to die because of sin God: Yes Jesus: Which you created as punishment God: Yes Jesus: For eating an apple God: Yes Jesus: No
@LackOfShame: I never feel like a bigger failure than when my dog re-scratches something I just scratched for her.
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