@joeljeffrey: I saw an attractive woman spank her kid in McDonalds after he threw his fries on the ground, so I also threw mine on the ground.
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@bridger_w: If your name got called on The Price is Right, it'd be fun to scream, jump up and down, and then run full speed out of the studio
@JumbledButts: *puts a DVD of 'Frozen' and a DVD of 'Dante's Peak' into the same DVD player* *'Waterworld' starts playing*
@XplodingUnicorn: 4-year-old: Can we have Oreos for dinner? Me: Are you crazy? That’d be terrible for you. 4: Mom’s not home. Me: *eats Oreos for dinner*