@bbseaside: I saw something yesterday that reminded me of you. I almost stepped in it.
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@mellimelle: Find a penny, pick it up. All day long you'll wtf, that thing is filthy. Wash your hands immediately.
@djdavemichaels: Do bouncers get paid in toothpicks or are they a part of their uniform, or what exactly is the deal here?
@TheFunnySayings: My ceiling fan has 3 settings: 1. Very slow 2. Slow 3. I'm about to detach from the ceiling and kill you in a freak ceiling fan accident