@Cheeseboy22: I saw this heartwarming video of baby bears climbing out of a dumpster and thought, "Who would throw away a perfectly good baby bear?"
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@jbillinson: "Yes Mr. Trump, I took Joe's pocket knife away and we'll get you some new tires for that limo right away, but I can't make him say sorry"
@Try2StopME: I had a pretty confused childhood because I thought obituaries are actually advertisements selling dead people.
@SergioValenCo: Girls love when you hug them from behind and whisper sweet nothings in their ears. Strangers, not so much.