@gavinpivott: I scratch your back, you scratch mine. We die from loss of blood.
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@XplodingUnicorn: 5-year-old: Dad! Dad! My sister- Me: Stop tattling. I don't want to hear about it unless there's blood. 5: Me: 5: How much blood?
@RegularFred: [Enter your password] Secret [Password must be 6 characters] Secrete [Password disgusting but accepted]
@jonnysun: grampa: i was sent to war when ur mother was a baby. i didnt kno if i'd see her again me: noo my uber stopped on the other side of the road