@weinerdog4life: I scream, you scream, we all scream, while I'm crawling under the bathroom stall to say hi to you.
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@Heather2Go: I have the body of a 25-year-old girl, a 25-year-old who has recently been eaten by a 40-year-old bear.
@SteveKoehler22: Oddly enough, ever since downloading AdBlock onto my computer ..... all the local girls in my area seem to have lost interest.
@uccjeb: When I see 18 wheelers carrying something covered with a tarp, I just assume that it's an injured Transformer.
@KelleysBreakRm: The reason I don't like Facebook's "memories" feature is because it shows me 6 years ago wearing the same shirt I have on right now.