@stockejock: I scream,
We all scream
Because grandpa fell asleep at the wheel again.
@RobertDuffy91: I refrain from jogging in the morning because according to Law & Order: SVU there is a 95% chance you'll find a dead body
@senorwinces: If you watch Intervention backwards, it's about a person partying hard after an awful family reunion.
@CrankyPappy: "Let's eat, Pappy."
Not "Let's eat Pappy."
Proof grammar saves lives.
@ImaFlyontheWall: True...so damn true
@StinkyGr33n: Also, those little Swiss Army knives are great when you need a tiny pair of scissors to open your Gummi Bears like some kind of crack head.