@HeyJennyLeone: I see that your IQ test came back negative.
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@KalvinMacleod: If there's one thing children have taught me it's how to count down from 5 while pretending there's a huge consequence if I ever reach zero.
@Owl_Meat: *puts bread in toaster* hmm something strange about the toaster today Duck(from in toaster): no there isnt
@DamienFahey: Just used the holiday card with your kid's face on it to scoop up a dog turd in the living room.
@JKNenagh: I saw a guy walking 4 dogs this morning and thought, Wow!.. That guy must be really blind.