@WowItsStephen: "I shot the sheriff but I did not shoot the deputy" is my favorite lyric about murdering law enforcement officials in moderation.
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@Donna_McCoy: Nothing stops me in my tracks faster than a five year old saying, "I got you a present!"
@Sickayduh: Me: Guess what Her: What Me: The opposite of Aquaman Her: ... Me: Is Landlady Her: ... Me: ... Her: Your rent is still due tomorrow Me: Ok
@MythicPicnic: A Spartan boy was ripped from his mother at seven and subjected to daily beatings My mother calls at 40+ to make sure that I'm still eating