@LaniBeno: I should probably do some housework before they try to film the next Febreeze commercial here.
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@thenatewolf: *on a first date* Me: [remembering how my friend said women like mysterious men] my favorite color is a secret
@colesprouse: You're losing followers because you're not relatable enough. Try mentioning that you eat pizza. If that doesn't work, play the ukulele.
@TheAlexP: Don't you hate when you do something out of the kindness of your heart & someone gets upset because you shoved a pack of gum in their mouth?