@kimmie_1980: I should start a wine company and name the bottles things like "don't be sad" "he's not worth it" "you deserve better"!
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@withanewname: After a failed college project to fight hunger, Clark decided to focus on fighting crime and thereby dropping a p from Supperman.
@GingerHotDish: Them: So why did you guys get divorced? Did he cheat? Me: We went to Costco on a Saturday.
@thepunningman: AA Milne: Ok rabbit, we'll call you Rabbit. Piglet, you can be Piglet Bear: Wow, real original AAM: [scribbles out Bear and writes Pooh]
@Scdavis24: That moment when you spell a word so wrong that even auto correct is like.... 'I've got nothing man.'