@TEXASVETERAN: I sing like Sinatra and have the brain of Einstein. I think that's why girls call me Frankenstein.
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@huntigula: [Donald Trump's election speech] "America, I have only 1 thing to say" *pulls off wig & mask revealing Ashton Kutcher* "YOU'VE BEEN PUNK'D"
@iAmDelFreaky: Haha! My mom said I can't use my phone at the dinner table. I'm a grown... This is Del's mom, he'll be back after he eats his dinner.
@MooseAllain: In a hotel room. The dog's growling and whimpering. My wife's worried the neighbours will think we're having sex.