@Jesssicle: I sleep with a water gun near my bed, in case of cat burglar.
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@neiltyson: FYI: By the end of the Twelve Days of Christmas song, your home is crammed with 23 flying Birds and 50 hyperactive Humans.
@WheelTod: [Raiding ISIS Safehouse] Green leader: Area secured. Over Me: Apple Turn. Over GL: Wha Me: Extreme make. Over GL: Take that guy out too
@Tmoney68: Stephen Hawking says artificial intelligence could destroy the human race. Sorry Stephen, but my money's on LACK of intelligence.
@Breadery: Remember when you were small & all you wanted was a pony but your parents were high on meth & thought the house was already full of ponies?