@BangGanged: I slept on the sofa last night which is weird because I'm not even married.
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@wickedimproper: Note to the 82 year old widow who won the Powerball jackpot last night: Sup, girl?
@JayTuvz: I used to play the triangle in a reggae band but left because it was just one ting after another.
@SortaSarcastic: She promised to teach me wax on, wax off. Only now my chest is bare, I'm frightened of candles, and pretty sure I still don't know karate.