@jwoodham: I socially identify as the guy who tried to jump off of the sinking Titanic but ending up hitting a massive propeller on the way down.
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@TheBlessMess: My gang hand signals look a lot like the finger in the hole motion, followed by the call me gesture.
@aveuaskew: Is this one haunted? "No" What about that one? "Ma'am, none of the booze is haunted" What kind of wine and spirits store is this?!
@Smug_Lemur: Forgot I started my stopwatch. It's now been 139:27.05 since I wondered how long it takes me to run five miles.
@PuncherJetpack: Not saying obamacare is perfect but the data doesn't lie. With Obamacare there've been zero Hitlers. Before obamacare there was at least one