@ibid78: "I sound nothing like that when I cry." -doves
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@topaz_kell: The good news about falling down the stairs is that my Fitbit counted it as a mile walk.
@amydillon: I'm going to donate these clothes I don't wear anymore to charity after I drive them around in the trunk of my car for eight months.
@theshantilly: Him: You're pretty obnoxious. You know that? Me: I'm sorry. All I heard was pretty.
@JElvisWeinstein: Just because I quit smoking doesn't mean I gave up getting up and randomly leaving the room for 10 minutes.