@jackmackenroth: I stand right next to the "God Hates Fags" guy with a sign that says "Please Ignore My Ex-Boyfriend"
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@Faceyspace: Initially I thought I would rather catch herpes than feelings. But then I realized herpes are forever.
@robdelaney: Maybe Van Gogh cut his ear off because someone traveled back in time and whispered a Drake song in it.