@ch000ch: [i sweetly pet a wild baby deer in my lap] aww this is so boring
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@blade_funner: Friend:*terrified* don't make a sound and maybe the killer won't find us Me: *quietly tries to tighten velcro sneakers*
@AimeeHelene1: 1st day of hunting season: *puts on camo* *climbs up in tree stand* *waits w/binoculars to see one hunter accidentally shoot another hunter*
@shariv67: "I'd make an awesome president. Give me a problem, any problem." "Um, population control?" "Kill all the storks. BOOM!"
@iGreenMonk: Because of Twitter, people use words like Twitterverse, Tweeple, and Twitcide. Which makes me want to twoot myself in the face.