@Skullcat: I take comfort in the fact that my neighbour will probably die before me. I'll be at his funeral, leafblowing through the entire ceremony.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@kiralc: explaining cat scratches is like defending an abusive boyfriend to your parents "he didn't mean it" "you guys just don't know him like I do"
@OhHellsYes: I need a car. Hiding in people's trunks and hoping they're going to Wal-Mart isn't working out for me.
@AnkCoupleTO: [doing crossword] Me: I'm looking for a word that means slight pause Her: Hiatus? Me: *erasing 'our sex life'* thanks