I take spiders outside in stead of killing them because it's not their fault that I'm scared of them. I do however, scream while doing so.

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@MrsFancyPants77: I take spiders outside in stead of killing them because it's not their fault that I'm scared of them.

I do however, scream while doing so.

I take spiders outside in stead of killing them because it’s not their fault that I’m scared of them.

I do however, scream while doing so.

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@KoKeniSasquatch: What idiot called it a transplant and not re-organ-izing?

@behindyourback: Birds do it/Bees do it/Even educated fleas do it/Let's do it/Let's make people super nervous anytime we're in their personal space

385

@Izianikapani: So if you eat what you like and don't exercise, eventually you get a motorised scooter. I'm really not seeing the down side here.

@DancesWithTamis: "Hola! I'm Señor Coconut, children" [cracks head on the pavement. Children scream] "Drink me. Drink me. I'm full of vitamins and minerals"

@Ygrene: [at the park] SON: dad dad what's that in the sky?! (points at helicopter) ME: (forgetting the word helicopter) that son is……a blenderplane

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