@jackiembouvier: I talk like a sailor in front of my kid. He's gonna swear anyway and I want him to be good at it.
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@WheelTod: Probably the worst part about being a snail is how you can't put salt on your French fries.
@smithsara79: Me: *trying to sleep but can't stop sniffling* sorry, the box of tissues on my nightstand is empty Him: if it's empty, it isn't a "box of tissues," it's just a box Me: *already blowing my nose on his sleeve*
@CoopSoSarc: Walking out the door, my daughter tells me she can't wait to see Ariel with the crabs. Now I'm questioning which section I bought that DVD.
@kathradical: I got my first period during Shrek 2 live in theaters which means I entered Shrek 2 a child & left a woman